Tuesday, January 10, 2012

The Big Lessons.

There are some basic, natural things that just happen to your brain when you become a parent. You feed your baby when he is hungry. You change his diaper when he's wet. You read him books, take him to the park, make sure he wears a hat when it is cold. These are things you don't have to think much about, you just do.

But now as Paul is getting older, my mind starts to wander about the "big" things I want to teach him. I think about what aspects of life I want to impress on him, what is important to us as a family, what are the battles I want to fight?

Of course there are less important lessons. I want Paul to have nice table manners, put his napkin in his nap, chew with his mouth closed, wait to eat until everyone is seated. I want to teach Paul to be grateful for gifts (no matter how big or small), write thank you notes, to say please and thank you, to say excuse me before he interrupts, to hold doors for others.

But then there are bigger things. I want him to be compassionate and empathetic for others. I want him to find passion. I want him to set big dreams without fear or worry they will fail. I want him to be a generous tipper at restaurants. I want him to be conscious of money without being cheap. I want him to forgive easily and believe in second chances. I want him to be able to laugh at himself, at his mistakes. I want him not only to tolerate others but truly accept people that are different than him. I want him to have a strong work ethic but find balance within his life. I want him to stand up for himself without being entitled. I want him to be a good friend.

Oh, and I want him to call his mom on her birthday.

What are your big lessons?


  1. He will have all of that and more.. as he has two amazing parents as role models.
    PS I loved this post ! ..

  2. My boys are 11 and 13. I'm always thinking of something new to add to this list. One of the main one is that they have good manners and respect when they are not with me and with others such as at school and at friends' houses.

  3. I want him to meet and fall in love with a beautiful and intelligent lady... just like his momma!

  4. This post had me in tears. Paul is sure to learn all these lessons and then some, with such terrific parents to guide him.

  5. thats a great list! i think just writing it all down and verbalizing what you want to instill is a great step towards making it happen.

  6. Elaine--this is beautiful! And I know Paul will do all this and more, as he has two beautiful parents to guide him!


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